the jaded viewer

[Rec]

[Rec] (2007)

Directed by Jaume Balaguero and Paco Plaza

"Is this on? Are you taping? Keep taping!! Is my mic working? Damn this thing is out of focus!"

"OMG! What the hell is coming towards us?!?!?"

"Turn the camera light on!"

"Use the night vision!"

[Cut to something blurry]

"Run!"

[Camera shakes uncontrollably while running]

Where have you heard all this before? Yup it's another 1st person POV flick ala Cloverfield and Diary of the Dead.

Mind you if you read my reviews of those films, I hate this stupid sub genre of horror. You feel naseous while watching, they quickly pan over what they should be taping directly and it's just alot of shaky camerca shots while running.

But Rec actually pulls this off and makes a decent showing using this convention.

Hollywood also knows this which is why they are remaking this brilliant Spanish film into a movie called Quarantine.

I don't know what it was but at a relatively 1 hour and 10 minutes, I really did enjoy myself. I didn't feel vomity, they recorded stuff that should have been taping and there was minimal running camera.

When you do everything the opposite of what I hate, jadedviewer likes.

Boring Plot-O-Matic

A hot looking local TV reporter named Angela (Manuela Velasco) and her camera dude are doing a story about the fire department and the men who work there. Out of the blue, they are called to an apartment building where neighbors and police are investigating a screaming crazy woman. But chaos ensues and soon the building has been quarantined by the special police trapping all the residents, police and firemen.

We see Angela continue to interview the neighbors and videotape the chaos. A health official soon drops in and explains a lethal virus has been unleashed that seem to create violent zombie-ish corpses who spread the illness through bites.

Soon, the building is overrun and it's Manhunt, Manhunt 1-2-3. Angela and camera guy try to find a way out.

Awesome Review-O-Matic

Angela is hot. So seeing her in most of the shots was easy on the eyes. But Manuela Velasco does an awesome-rific job of being the fearless reporter and acting scared shitless. She's definitely the catalyst for the flick and if she couldn't pull off this performance, Rec would have been another movie in the used bin.

And whereas you always question the cameraman and why he doesn't help during the crazy chaos of whats happening....in Rec, our fearless camera guy Manu actually does some useful things. In doing so, the camera actually helps. Complete darkness? No problem, use the camera light. No camera light? Use Night Vision. Logical...I appreciate that.

The 1st 20 or so minutes sets up the chaos to come. The 2nd 30 is so minutes is everybody trying to find out what the fuck is going on and the final 20 is a survival horror at its best.

I particularly didn't like the ending as it came out of leftfield but it's satisfying like lemonade on a hot sunny day.


Influences

Blair Witch Project, Cloverfield, Diary of the Dead, 28 Days Later, The Ring

Gore-ipedia

Bloody chomps on necks, old fat crazy lady wounds

WTF moment

The final 10 minutes

The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis

I'm still jaded by these POV flicks. I just don't really like em. But this is the first one that I actually sorta enjoyed that didn't have me beating my head against the wall.

The residents of the building were all very unique. A Chinese family, a woman and her sick daughter, an elderly couple and a guy off his rocker. At least they weren't hipsters.

A lot of hype will accompany this film and its Hollywood ripoff as the handheld "cinema verite" flicks keep giving birth.

I can honestly say I wasn't bored and I'm a nega-reviewer on these flicks.

Just remember when your in a life threatening situation, and you have a camera...keep recording. Because your battery will never die, you'll have endless tape and you'll always keep things in focus.

And after you die, all your friends will see the video of you in our last waning moments, actually know how big of a wimp you are and give them vague theories as to how you died.

Then post it on YouTube.

Rating:
The Trailer:

Tags:
[rec], rec review , rec , spanish+horror, quarantine, zombies, top horror movies of 2008, bloody violence, pov+horror, horror++cinema+verite, cloverfield,

Labels: 28 days later, [rec], blair witch project, cinema verite, cloverfield, diary of the dead, pov horror, quarantine, rec, rec review, spanish horror

Posted by the jaded viewer at 9:30 PM | Permalink | Comments | links to this post

Q: The Winged Serpent

Q: The Winged Serpent (1982)

Directed by Larry Cohen

[It's a mini rewind review here at the jadedviewer.com. These were orignally posted on Netflix before they banned me. Enjoy!]

I was figuring this to be a cheesy B-movie, Godzilla/King Kong like movie...but it didn't have any cheese.

I can appreciate a film where you can MST3K it but this was so bad I was writhing in pain while viewing it. I think it might have had to do with how I can't tolerate David Carradine and how the serpent had like 10% of screen time!

Instead I had to endure a dumb plot revolving around a totally unlikeable character. Larry Cohen made It's Alive and some other B-movie flicks. At least those had good, cheese.

Rating:

The Trailer:

Tags:
q the winged serpent, q the winged serpent review , larry cohen , david carradine, monster movies, b movies, 1980s horror, bloody violence, nyc horror, chrysler building,

Labels: 1980s horror, b movies, cheesy, chrysler building, david carradine, larry cohen, netlfix, nyc horror, q, q the winged serpent, q the winged serpent review trailer

Posted by the jaded viewer at 9:28 PM | Permalink | Comments | links to this post

The good ole Japanese film industry keeps churning out some really, good interesting creative horror. And when you think we've stop stealing from them, Hollywood is ready with their checkbook.

The next movie in line for a horror remake is Death Note.

Plot-o-matic:

A battle between the world's 2 greatest minds begins when Light Yagami finds the Death Note, a notebook with the power to kill, and decides to rid the world of criminals.

The original Japanese trailer is below (with English subs!)



Tags:
death note, desu noto , death note trailer , japanese horror, hollywood horror remake, light yagami, top horror movies of 2008, bloody violence

Labels: death note, hollywood remake, j-horror, japanese horror, manga

Posted by the jaded viewer at 12:04 AM | Permalink | Comments | links to this post

An American Crime

An American Crime (2007)

Directed by Tommy O'Haver

After watching Juno, there is something very disturbing seeing Ellen Page play a torture victim. I was like...stop torturing Juno!!
But Ellen Page is not acting as Juno, but Sylvia Likens. And as Sylvia Likens she gets tortured and punished....horrificly. Watching the true story of this horrific crime was the most grueling 1 hour and 37 minutes I've ever endured....other than playing soccer.

I first read about the Sylvia Likens murder after watching Jack Ketchum's The Girl Next Door which I ranked #4 on the best horror movies of 2007.

That movie loosely skims the story and gives it a different POV. However, the torture and the horribleness is still intact.

But in this movie, it's Catherine Keener's performance as Gertrude that makes this film more disturbing. In one scene she subtlely asks her son "Who's in charge?" and the son replies "You are Momma". That says it all.

Gertrude believes in her lies, her selfishness for herself is so pure and the delusion she is doing this for her children eventually leads to her downfall.

Plot-O-Matic

The true story (based on court transcripts) of suburban housewife Gertrude Baniszewski, who kept a teenage girl (Sylvia Liken) locked in the basement of her Indiana home during the 1960s.

That's he plain vanilla of the plot. Here's the rest.

Sylvia and her sister Jenny are left to Gertrude's care via their parents (who are circus workers). Given $20 a month, she is willing to take care of them though she has 5 other kids.

Gertrude's life is in shambles (lack of money, crying baby, crazy kids), she seems to snap...but in a very calculated way. She decides to take out her frustration on Sylvia. Thus we see these 2 characters begin their eventual demise.

The 2 interlocked stories of Gertrude and Sylvia are critical here. The psychological and physical torture that Sylvia goes thru via Gertrude's delusional madness is suburban america gone awry. Her thought control via her kids makes us wonder why this crime occured.

Intermixed are scenes from the trial. Each of the kids gives testimony and when asked why they also tortured Sylvia too....they answer "I don't know".

One actually has to wonder...are all these kids that really fucked up and didn't know what they were doing was fuckin wrong??

And why didn't the more moral-listic kids call the cops? (which the prosecuting lawyer actually asked Jenny, Sylvia's sister who responded she was threatened by Gertrude and was too scared to do so.)

The neighbors who hear the screams are useless as is the minister.

But if the 60's were devoid of the Internet soaked violence we see today, I could see everybody's obliviousness to this....but seriously....it's kinda fucked up right?

Later on, Sylvia gets accused of spreading lies about Stephanie and is deemed a whore and slut. She gets thrown into the basement and even the most jaded viewer like myself can only watch and repeat during the sickening torture: "That's fucked up."

The ending was a little gimmicky as the audience knows this resulted in a murder. See below.

SPOILER ALERT!!!!!

We see an "alternate Sylvia reality" where we see her escape with Ricky and she tells her parents what happened but in reality it is all a dream and she has died.

END SPOILER ALERT

That wasn't really necessary but serves as a Shylaman-ish like device. Ellen Page's narration is a nice touch and the end is semi TV Movie of the Week.

Influences

The actual crime, Jack Ketchum's The Girl Next Door....thats it.

Torture-pedia

Sylvia gets spanked.
Sylvia gets beaten up and slapped.
Sylvia's fingers almost get broken.
Sylvia goes through coke bottle/private part trauma.
Sylvia gets starved to death.
Sylvia gets cigarrette burns.
Sylvia gets branded with a soldering needle that reads: "I'm a prostitute and proud of it!".
Sylvia dies.

WTF Moment

Little Johnny invites neighborhood kids to ridicule and torture Sylvia then proceeds to burn cigarettes into Juno's skin...err I mean Sylvia.

The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis

It's Catherine Keener's performance that steals the show. She plays Gertrude with that abused wife and struggling mother that fits so well on Lifetime. You begin to feel for her character until she starts to abuse Sylvia endlessly.

It seems her punishment towards Sylvia was a reflection on her own life...one she didn't want to believe she deserved.

An American Crime is not as good as A Girl Next Door. It plays out very Lifetime-ish but the performances are awesome-rific. Seeing a pre-Juno Ellen Page is pretty cool as her talent shows here playing a very complicated character.

This movie is not a horror movie but a movie about the horror of a crime so unbelievable, the fact that it actually happened gives you chills.

This is what I wrote below for The Girl Next Door which I have to say applies to this film as well.

There is no huge body count, no excessive gore or splatter, no corny humor or gratuitous nudity.

What is in this movie is seeing evil with a justified happy face in the form of a sadistic psycho mom and her progeny.

There are NO supernatural monsters, unkillable slashers or even mutant sheep, all you see is the evil face of humanity and what humans are capable of doing to each other, that's the most frightening thing you can ever witness.

That really does sum it up best.

The movie is currently playing on Showtime and is on Showtime on Demand. It comes out on DVD, August 19th 2008.

Rating:

Tags:
an american crime, an american crime review , ellen page , showtime, sylvia likens murder, torture, top horror movies of 2008, bloody violence,

Labels: an american crime, an american crime trailer, ellen page, sylvia liken

Posted by the jaded viewer at 1:10 AM | Permalink | Comments | links to this post

Chuck Palahniuk's awesome-rific book is now a full fledge fucked up movie.

Colonial Times enactments, sex addicts, rock building and Jesus's geneology.

Good times.

The trailer is below.



Tags:
choke, choke trailer , chuck palahniuk , the jaded viewer, sex addict, gratuitous nudity,

Labels: choke, Choke trailer, Chuck Palahniuk, colonial times, fox searchlight

Posted by the jaded viewer at 4:40 PM | Permalink | Comments | links to this post