par·kour n. (park-joor') An activity in which the participant movies quickly and fluidly, by surmounting obstacles such as walls and railings and leaping across open spaces.
Not going to write a long review here. I recently picked this flick up at a cheap DVD store and with the pending US DVD and theatrical release upcoming, I'd thought I'd share my thoughts.
When I first saw the original District 13 I ranked it #9 on my top 10 movies of 2006. Back then I had only scene glimpses of free running and parkour on YouTube, I was to say the least intrigued. The guys who created parkour David Belle (who stars in this D13) and Sébastien Foucan (he was recently in The Tournament) have turned into action stars and the original was outright fuckin awesome.
Parkour moves are a thrill to watch. Seeing dudes jump from tall buildings is outright fascinating. And to see dudes effortlessly jump in and out of tight spots and maneuver from angles and heights that would scare Evil Knievel is freakin fun.
As for the movie, following the story of the original, France is still divided into districts, each with their own racial gang. You got your I-talians, Blacks, Asians and Arabs. When the corrupt police plan to destroy District 13, its up to Belle and fellow traceur Cyril Raffaelli (he plays the super cop) to kick ass, parkour away from inept French police and unite the gangs to save their beloved home.
All in all, a good solid action flick filled with humor, uber action porn and the best traceurs (parkour performers) the discipline has to offer. Be sure to check out the original before you see this (as its actually better). Parkour!
Rating:
1/2
Check out the trailer below.
Here is the trailer of the original movie.
And finally here is one of the first American parkour videos I ever saw. Pretty awesome.
I posted a test trailer for The Tournament in May, 2008. It's been removed obviously by now but it looked fuckin awesome. So it's odd that over a year later, we finally get to see the official trailer for this seemingly awesome action fest.
So what all the hype-o-palooza all about?
Here's the plot.
Every 7 years in an unsuspecting town, The Tournament takes place. A battle royale between 30 of the world’s deadliest assassins. The last man standing receiving the $10,000,000 cash prize and the title of Worlds No 1 (which itself carries the legendary million dollar a bullet price tag). The Tournament is set up by a group of sick high stake billionaires who watch the mayhem unfold via CCTV and bet on its outcome.
We're not talking no name actors here. It's some top notch A list mofo's as your fucked up assassins.
Ian Somerhalder, Kelly Hu,Robert Carlyle, Scott Adkins, Ving Rhames ...
Thanks to Twitch, the final official trailer is now online. Check it out below.
Check out the official site for some stills and other goodies. The movie is to be released sometime this year.
It looks like non stop action with a demented twist. Like Surviving the Game with pros. Or Thirst but with assassins. The UK are actionmeisters when it comes to this shit so hopefully this will get a theatrical release.
A new extended trailer has been released for The Eagle Path, the new character action movie from the muscles from Brussels, Jean Claude Van Damme.
We still have no fuckin idea when this is going to get released but I love how the new trailer sums up the plot to obliterate people so that he can rescue a women (who I think is a hooker).
He then recruits a bunch of his buddies to help him.
Hmm, maybe this is why Jean Claude turned down The Expendables. Maybe this movie is like Stallone's. But whereas The Expendables is testosterone, roided up action porn, JCVD's looks to be the Skinemax equivelant.
If you forgot the plot, see below.
A military veteran and former mercenary, Frenchy (Van Damme) works as a taxi driver, hiding somewhere in East Asia, haunted by his past. After his driving shifts he often frequents the Eagle's Nest, a seedy bar that houses a caged eagle. In the midst of the chaotic Asian traffic Frenchy picks up a beautiful female passenger who will change him forever.
Driven by dark memories of his childhood, he becomes determined to improve her life and, without her approval, he embarks on a journey which proves to be more dangerous and complicated then he expected. After encountering a series of harrowing obstacles he calls in favors from his special ops friends who immediately join him. His military team engages in the biggest fight of their lives. War is hell, but nothing they've done could have prepared them for this.
It’s an adrenaline-fueled, full-on, maximum firepower thriller, filled with the intense psychological conflict that Van Damme fans love the world over.
Check out the new, longer full extended trailer below.
It's always a big event here at the jaded viewer when a new Jean Claude Van Damme movie looms over the horizon. JCVD is back in The Eagle Path, a movie he wrote, edited and directed.
I mean look at that fuckin poster! He's holding a damn hand cannon.
And the freakin tagline is: Haunted By The Past, His Vengeance Knows No Limits.
OH FUCKIN YEAH HIS VENGEANCE KNOWS NO FUCKIN LIMITS!!!!
He's Jean Claude Van Damme!
Trailer looks pretty "character action" oriented. Just the way JCVD likes it. Lots of car chases, double fisting Woo-ish gun battles and a freakin eagle.
What's not to like?
Check out the plot.
A military veteran and former mercenary, Frenchy (Van Damme) works as a taxi driver, hiding somewhere in East Asia, haunted by his past. After his driving shifts he often frequents the Eagle's Nest, a seedy bar that houses a caged eagle. In the midst of the chaotic Asian traffic Frenchy picks up a beautiful female passenger who will change him forever.
Driven by dark memories of his childhood, he becomes determined to improve her life and, without her approval, he embarks on a journey which proves to be more dangerous and complicated then he expected. After encountering a series of harrowing obstacles he calls in favors from his special ops friends who immediately join him. His military team engages in the biggest fight of their lives. War is hell, but nothing they've done could have prepared them for this.
It’s an adrenaline-fueled, full-on, maximum firepower thriller, filled with the intense psychological conflict that Van Damme fans love the world over.
The Eagle Path will be premiering at Cannes and TIFF this summer.
Check out the trailer below. Thanks to Twitch for the heads up.
Prachya Pinkaew, the director of awesome-rific films Ong Bak and Tom Yum Goong , is the reigning king of action cinema.
And Chocolate again shows why guns and shootouts are fuckin overrated.
It's been a while since a full out martial arts flick totally blew me away.
JeeJa Yanin is breathtaking as Zen, an autistic girl who accumulates her martial arts skills by watching who else...Tony Jaa. Her muay thai skills are unfuckinbelievable and as always, there are no stunt doubles and all the action stunts you see are as is. The outtakes are at the end.
Fuck the plot and any character development. It's totally irrelelevant. What you came here to see is non stop muay thai choreography at its finest. This is vintage Jackie Chan (ala Police Story) with stunts, jumps, flips and the backround as weaponry.
An autistic woman with powerful martial art skills looks to settle her ailing mother's debts by seeking out the ruthless gangs that owe her family money.
Awesome Review-O-Matic
OK. The plot above is why all these elaborate fight scenes develop. Zen and her cousin need money to help her mom buy badly needed medicine. They first use Zen's autistic skills via a ball toss exhibition. But they know they need more cash so they seek out the local gang owned businesses that owe her mom money. This soon ticks off the crime overlord and soon he's on their tail.
Zen also loves chocolate M&M's (hence the title), loves her Teddy Bear and has a fear of flies. This all comes into play during whats to play out.
But really that was all irrelevant.
For this review, for all intended purposes, is to grade each of the fight scenes on a number grade from 1 to 10 with 1 being shitty to 10 being fuckin awesome.
So let's get started.
1.) Hoodrats fight scene
Some teenage hoodrats test Zen's catching skills with a knife. She then uses an arsenal of mimicked Tony Jaa moves to go all Ong Bak on them. This was 18 minutes in and you get a good taste of whats to come. Like some chicken wings as an appetizer. You know it's going to get better.
Rating - 6.0
2.) Ice Factory fight scene
After a anime moment of clarity and 33 minutes in, we get the ice factory fight scene. Wow. Totally awesome. Zen shows off her mega lightning kicks and disposes of henchman without a sweat. Blocks of ice can't stop our little Zen.
Rating - 7.5
3.) Warehouse fight scene
38 minutes in, Zen is in full effect. She's using the warehouse as a weapon of mass destruction. Slipping in through tight spots and using lockers, chairs and cardboard boxes as a playground of weaponry, it's a beautiful thing to watch.
Spinkicks, swipe kicks, flying backward spin kicks, flying splits and a few comedy kicks to boot. And the climax is a slide under a glass table that only Zen could pull off. FUCK YEAH!!! Poor henchman. Why do they keep trying?
Rating - 8.0
4.) Meat Factory/Butchery fight scene
Does Zen have a weakness? Well remember that fear of flies? Well Houston, we have a problem. But thanks to her cousin whose there with a electronic fly swatter, problem solved.
45 minutes in, we are going to see meat cleavers and knives and a spinkick-palooza. Never has a butchery ever been so critical to some ass kicking. A few sporadic funny ha ha's during the fight scene with some elbows to the head make this one of the most entertaining fight scenes ever. The stunt team is so critical to the action. They are the one's getting hit and they are getting hit really fuckin hard. Kudos to them.
Rating - 8.0
5.) Rooftop restaurant fight scene (with Mini boss #1!)
Let's just list some fragmented action highlights. Elbows through the head. Knees to the face. Some acrobatic kicks to the face. A fight scene that takes place with Zen crouched down under some pipes. All this climaxes to a knee to the head that is without a doubt the best I've ever seen.
Rating - 9.0
6.) Restaurant dojo fight scene
No holds barred as we get an onslaught of henchman for Zen to kick the shit out off. This is muay thai action at its finest. All the kicks and elbows and punches are perfectly timed. The flips and jumps all choreographed without any flaws. 360 spinkicks to the back of of the head. Just beautiful. A knee to the face in awesome-rific slo mo. Oh yeah.
And we're not even done!!!
Because the next scene is probably the most politically incorrect thing you'll ever see in an action movie. BUT WHO FUCKIN CARES!!! IT'S FUCKIN AWESOME!!!!
BIG SPOILER BELOW!!!!
Zen has to face off against the crime lord's biggest weapon yet. An autistic mini boss #2!!!!
This dude in glasses and an Adidas track suit has some autism too and he's as spazzy as can be. Plus he's got this breakdancing muay thai style she's never seen. Zen gets her ass kicked but she uses her snapshot focused brain to mimic her enemy. Soon she's spazzing and kicking mini boss #2 unconcious. The finishing move is just totally unbelievable. Bless all stunt wire work!!!
You have see this to believe it. SO AWESOME I THINK I WET MYSELF.
END BIG SPOILER!!!!
But it's not over yet. We get a samurai sword-palooza and soon Zen has snapshot her dad's moves to eliminate this threat.
Which then leads too...........
Rating - 9.5
7.) Side of the building fight scene(FINAL BOSS SCENE!!)
This is single handidly the best fight scene on the side of a building EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Zen has to chase final boss through a parade of fire escapes, neon signs and the side of a train platform. It perfectly plays out. Because you know henchmen are gonna fall down some 2 stories...badly.
A great way to end the film. The final fight scene is everything you wanted it to be. Such killer stunts and action sequences, I can't believe they accomplished all of this in less than 90 minutes.
Rating - 10.0
Influences
Are you kidding me? Prachya Pinkaew and his stunt team are their own influence on other films.
Gore-ipedia (if you want to be shocked don't read)
This ain't horror son.
Nude-ipedia
Dude, this ain't horror.
WTF moment The spoiler scene listed above. I lost my shit when I saw it. So awesome.
The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis
This may be the first movie I may give 5 spinkicks too. But I'll give it 4 plus an extra spinkick for being so awesome. Non existent plot and motive plus the fact that the last 30 minutes were all action makes this one of the best films of 2008. Chocolate hit on all cylinders of what it was suppose to be. A non stop action sequence from start to finish.
An autistic woman with powerful martial art skills looks to settle her ailing mother's debts by seeking out the ruthless gangs that owe her family money.
JeeJa Yanin is breathtaking in the trailer below. Her muay thai skills are unfuckinbelievable and as always, there are no stunt doubles and all the action stunts you see are as is.
District 13: Ultimatum
