the jaded viewer

Shut Yo Mouth! Black Dynamite is out on DVD/Blu-Ray Today!!!

Did you know that if you purchase Black Dynamite on Blu Ray or DVD you SAVE an orphan from being addicted from smack???

You didn't know that did you? Well it's true. I know you guys don't want to see a 6 year old, addicted to smack breaking into your home, playing your Xbox 360, drinking a Dr. Pepper and then selling your horror collection for a fix.

So do something about it! By purchasing Black Dynamite, you get that kid off the street and into a detox program where he will be given the best in medical treatment (or what's under Black Dynamite's health coverage, plus he gets a lollipop and a dollar worth of quarters for the local arcade).

If that doesn't convince you, then check out the links below.

jaded viewer related linkage:

See Black Dynamite, Save Orphans from Smack!

Well this is a rare Saturday post because we have an emergency.

Did you know if you go to the theater and watch Black Dynamite an orphan gets detoxed from smack?

You didn't know that did you. Well it's true. I know you guys don't want to see a 6 year old, addicted to smack breaking into your home looking for some loose change so he can get his next fix.

So do something about it! By donating money to see Black Dynamite, you get that kid off the street and into a detox program where he will be given the best in medical treatment (plus he gets a lollipop and a a dollar worth of quarters for the local arcade).

In all seriousness, Black Dynamite has gotten this theatrical run due to the blogs, fan hype and word of mouth. But this has not equaled box office success. If the movie doesn't get more dead presidents, it'll be pulled from it's theatrical run.

So let's get crackin. Do it for the orphans and for the blaxploitation engine that could.

If that doesn't convince you, then check out the links below.

jaded viewer related linkage:

Black Dynamite (Exclusive Clips!)

It's Thursday. It's a very good Thursday because tonight I'm going to see Black Dynamite! Wooohooo! Yay! Too bad suckas!

Well I've been hyping up this flick by posting the trailer, putting up funny ass clips and Fighting Smack in the Orphanage.

I'm super amped up to see this flick and you should be too. I'm going to get ready by drinking a 40 of some Anaconda Malt Liquor and also fighting that damn smack in the orphanage. You should too. I mean these little orphans are hooked and prostituting by the age of 2 for shits sake.

My review will be up tomorrow (hopefully if I don't drink to much Anaconda). For now, check out some exclusive clips from some jibber jabbering cult sites FunnyorDie and OnSmash.com.

OnSmack.com Black Firecracker TNT with Ebony Explosion “Black Dynamite's Dojo”

FunnyorDie.com's Fight Smack in the Orphanage "Man on the Street

Fight Smack in the Orphanage...Man on the Street - watch more funny videos

FunnyorDie.com's War on Smack

War on Smack - watch more funny videos

Also, we got more viral yumminess. What else you ask you jive ass fool?

Black Dynamite Yo'Self

Black Dynamite Talkin' Jive (Soundboard)

Aren't you psyched up you punk ass brothas?

Black Dynamite opens October 16th.

Labels: Anaconda Malt Liquor, black dynamite, black dynamite red band trailer, blaxploitation

Posted by the jaded viewer at 12:05 AM | Permalink | Comments | links to this post

Fight Smack in the Orphanage!!!

I received a press packet from an organization calling itself FSITO or Fight Smack in the Orphanage. Included in this packet of awesome stuff was:

A letter detailing their goals and history
That awesome t-shirt above
2 Fight Smack stickers
An awesome syringe pen
A Fight Smack in the Orphanage DVD with 3 different PSAs

FSITO is devoted to stopping smack and carrying out "smack-downs" in areas where there is a smack epidemic.

As their info page tells us:

In 1973, feminist writer/child advocate Gloria Grey published her seminal best-seller We Are A Gentle Angry People: The Rise of Orphan Smack Addiction in the Latter Half of the Twentieth Century. Though it was often filled with inaccuracies, misconceptions, factual errors, and plagiarized portions of unpublished Jacqueline Suzanne novels, it managed to catch of eye of community leader, Marion Barry - the godfather of the anti-Smack movement of the early 70s.

Though unlikely partners, Gray and Barry joined forces to lay the groundwork of what was to become Fight Smack in the Orphanage (FSITO) by organizing the first citywide “Smack-down” in Los Angeles in 1974. Later that year, with help from several government grants and the proceeds of Ms. Gray’s lucrative mail order macramé business, they opened the first FSITO Rehabilitation Center on Crenshaw Boulevard in L.A.
Over the next thirty years, more than one-hundred FSITO Centers opened their doors in locations all across the United States and Guam. These centers are no longer just places that kids can get clean, but symbols of hope that inspire the entire community. Some also offer Pilates.

Sadly, the battle is not over. There are still thousands of Smack-addicted orphans on the streets looking for their next fix.

FSITO refuses to give up. We know that with your help and support we can fight Smack and save the orphans.

See how this is affecting your local communicating by watching these PSAs.

Look at all these kids FSITO has helped! The people who have helped can tell you straight out it's changed their lives. Damn! That's some crazy shit!

Fuck health care! We gotta fight smack before all the kids are hooked by all those malevolent addicting drugs. Go here to help.

Because as the FSITO motto says: Because Orphans Don't Have Parents.

**WTF was that all about?**

If you haven't guessed it, FSITO is promo, viral happiness for Black Dynamite, the blaxploitation badass masterpiece that comes out October 16th. You can check out the trailer here. And more viral videos complete with a vintage Anaconda Malt Liquor ad as well.

Thanks to the PR people from Black Dynamite for sending these awesome promo materials.

I'll be posting more Black Dynamite viral shenanigans as we get em. Shut yo mouth!

**End WTF was that all about?**

Labels: black dynamite, black dynamite clip, black dynamite red band trailer, black dynamite trailer

Posted by the jaded viewer at 12:05 AM | Permalink | Comments | links to this post

Black (Trailer)

As I eagerly wait for promo materials for Black Dynamite, I'm getting into a jive motherfucka mood by reading the novelization of Black Devil Doll (book review to come soon!) and by watching a French blaxploitation trailer called Black.

Yup. I did say French blaxploitation.

Directed by Pierre Laffargue and starring MC Jean Gab'1 (he was in District B-13) it's got all the elements of The Man, stolen diamonds and our star Black, who is one tough motherfucker.

Here be the plot.

When his Parisian armored car holdup goes horribly awry, our protagonist Black needs to go on the lam. News from his cousin in Senegal about a stash of uncut diamonds in a poorly guarded bank in Dakar hatches the plan to go on a working vacation that involves a little sightseeing and a lot of mayhem.

Check out the trailer below.

Labels: Black Caesar, black devil doll, black devil doll review, black dynamite, black dynamite clip, black dynamite red band trailer, black trailer, blaxploitation, french film

Posted by the jaded viewer at 12:05 AM | Permalink | Comments | links to this post

Holy Sucka! Black Dynamite and Black Devil Doll (Info and Release Dates)

I recently received e-mails from Scott Sanders, director of Black Dynamite and Shawn Lewis, writer of Black Devil Doll which gave me a happy. It's awesome when both dudes give you props for supporting and giving interweb buzz for their films.

First let's start with Black Dynamite, which screened at the Tribeca Film Festival (which I missed catching it at).

The official release date is October 16, 2009.

Also, the black forces of power Sanders and star Michael Jai White will be at this year's San Diego Comic Con.

The panels they'll be at are below.

The Black Panel

Saturday, July 25

10:00 AM / 5AB

Featuring Ludacris, Kel Mitchell, Prodigal Sunn, Reggie Hudlin, Denys Cowan and BD Team Member Michael Jai White

The Black DYNAMITE Panel

Saturday, July 25

6:30 PM

Hosted by Elvis Mitchell

Featuring Scott Sanders, Michael Jai White, Salli Richardson-Whitfield, Byron Minns, and Cedric Yarbrough

Never before seen clips and more viral videos are a coming like this one where Black Dynamite and Supreme Court nominee Judge Sonia Sotomayor agree on numchucks.

Now on to Black Devil Doll which will have it's last theatrical screening in NYC. I'm definitely going to be at that one so say what's what and give the jaded viewer a shoutout mofo!

Shawn Lewis dropped some motherfuckin one sheets of the film and get this...the movie's got a MOTHERFUCKIN TIE IN NOVEL!

You heard me straight you jive ass fool. A sequel novel!

Check out the images below and click on them for a more detailed look.

As always, head over to the official site for more info.

I'm super uber psyched about both flicks. You should be too. Fuck Hollywood! Killer pimp dolls and throwback black super agent heroes is where its at!

Labels: black devil doll, black devil doll trailer, black dynamite, black dynamite clip, black dynamite red band trailer, blaxploitation

Posted by the jaded viewer at 12:05 AM | Permalink | Comments | links to this post

Black Dynamite (Anaconda Malt Liquor and Red Band Trailers)

"Anaconda Gives you "oooooooooooooooooo."

I wanna soooooooo drink some Anaconda Malt Liquor. The only malt liquor approved by the United States government.

Thanks to Twitch, we get to see this throwback TV spots. Check em out below.

Black Dynamite has been selected to be part of the Sundance film festival so it probably will come out next year.

Also check out the BD holiday greeting. HO!!! HO!!!! HO!!!!!

And the NEW RED BAND NSFW Trailer you jive ass mofo!!!!!