the jaded viewer

Screw Balls

Screw Balls (1983)

Directed by Rafal Zielinski

It's the grandfather of the balls comedy.

I'll be honest, I was a wee lad when Screwballs came out in 1983. When I hit my teens, I rented all the classics: Fast Times, Last..Virgin, Porkys, Private School, etc. The one thing about video rental stores back then (mine was called Flagship Video) was that they'd rent anything to anybody.

So disgruntled video store employees let me rent the sicko horror and the T&A sex comedies.

I gotta admit, I missed seeing this one during my VHS rental days. So I'm glad Severin Films finally released this classic sex comedy on DVD (and on glorious Blu Ray). Seeing an 80s teen sex comedy brings back memories of seeing boobies for the first time on the screen. It's a turning point in a kid's life. You'll always remember your first pair of boobies from the movies.

Thank goodness for Screwballs because there's a ton of em in this flick.

Boring Plot-O-Matic

(From IMDB)

Starting a new tradition of sex comedy, T & A High School, five boys meet in the detention room thanks to the evil virgin princess urity Busch. RICK - dressed as a doctor and gave breast exams to the high school new comers. BRENT - sexually teased Purity in French class. MELVIN - caught masterbating in the meat locker. HOWIE - rearranged the mirrors in order to see up the skirts of cheerleaders after practice. And TIM - tricked into entering the girls watchroom. Each one fooled by Purity. They want revenge. Each one makes a packed to deflower the virgin, but all have failed. Their only chance is to work together with others of the school to get her at the homecoming game

Awesome Review-O-Matic

If your a Gen X-er, you grew up in a time before the Internet, before cable and before you had any access to porn. I grew up during this time and it was hard to see any nudity whatsover. So when Porkys was released, it turned the teen sex comedy into a gold mine. And luckily for everybody else, we got see to see some serious T&A every few months.

Screwballs comes from canuckland, which was funded by the Canadian government and produced by the b-movie auteur Roger Corman cha chinged Screwballs for the American teen audience.

Screwballs follows the same formula that would be the staple for this genre. Bunch of horny teen dudes want to score some sex and peek some boobies. The dudes are your stereotypical class society high school reps.

1.) Rick - Our kooky Bueller like smart ass
2.) Brent - Our rich and wealthy tennis racket wielding Trump snob
3.) Howie - Our nerd, geek and mad scientist
4.) Melvin - Our jerkmeister, fat slob
5.) Howie - Our transfer kid goofball

Each of them gets Republican-ized by Purity Bush (what a name), a blonde bombshell, uncorrupted and hot. They all soon go all Mission Impossible to try to score with her and get a look at those glorious boobies.

The plot is really filler, because most of Screwballs is the insanity of the situations so that we, the audience get to see some grade A boobies. So what are these situations? Here be your Nude-ipedia

1.) Rick gets to see some freshman boobies playing doctor
2.) Howie's plan to see Purity has him seeing girl boobies by the pool
3.) Howie shoots and scores some boobies at a drive in
4.) Nude bowling
5.) Purity's glorious boobies are revealed at the very end

That's just a areola tip of the nude-ipedia.

There are also a couple of goofy, cartoony like scenes that make the action go POW! BOOM! UHHH! VROOM! One of our goofy posse gets a bowling ball stuck in his [HONK!] Others have a near riot at a Drive In and some close moments at Purity's house.

All in all, it's a classic in a sense that the sexual innuendos, the goofy visual jokes and the super duper boob shots are all hitting the right notes. With this genre coming back in the 21st century, it's always good to see what started it all.

Thanks to a cool anonymous reader, a good solid list of where to start can be found here (check out the comments).

It was so hard back then to see nudity. Now it's as easy as clicking a button. Just another leap for mankind.

WTF moment

The boobies of Purity seen around the world

The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis

Screwballs is now released on DVD and you can order the regular DVD or Blu Ray on Amazon.com. Thanks to Severin Films for sending me a screener of this classic.

As for the DVD extras, there are a couple of solid features.

• Cast and Crew interviews (Director's Rafal Zielinski is an interesting one)
• An Interview with Canuxspoitation Scholar (this was very informative as we learn the Canadian government thru some tax loopholes was solely responsible for birth the "balls" comedies and even Cronenberg's first films!)
• Mr. Skin Talks Sex Comedies of the 80s (I didn't even know what these dudes looked like, and their commentary is quite funny and retrospectivy)
• Deleted Scenes
• Trailers
• Audio Commenary with Director Rafal Zielinski

Rating:

The trailer

Screwballs (1983) - These bloopers are hilarious

Tags:
screwballs, screwballs trailer , screwballs review , sex comedy 1980s, canucksploitation, fast times at ridgemont high, porkys, gratuitous nudity, nudity, boobies, 80s teen sex comedy, horror blog

Labels: 80s comedy, canada, fast times at ridgemont high, gratuitous nudity, screwballs, screwballs review, screwballs teen sex comedy, t and a

Posted by the jaded viewer at 12:05 AM | Permalink | Comments | links to this post

Pontypool

Pontypool (2009)

Directed by Bruce McDonald

When you're me, you think you've seen every kind of horror film ever made. Especially when it comes to zombie films. So when I went to go see Pontypool, I figured I'd be seeing another variation of The Signal or Pulse or 28 Days Later. You know, that old run of the mill story of zombies hordes attacking stereotypical survivors trapped in a confined space.

But I was shocked that Pontypool was a totally different type of pretzel I've never seen before.

It's an actually intelligent virus turning the masses into a bunch of crazies type movie that can be perceived in many ways. Is it a satire of censorship? A commentary on geopoliticalisms? Or is it just a suspense driven horror film to scare the crap out of you.

Well, it's all 3 and so much more.

Pontypool is definitely this years The Signal (which I ranked #3 on my Top 10 Horror Movies of 2008). Yes, Virginia you can make a movie about a virus gone awry and make it thought provoking and clever. We can thank the Canadians for making that. Hollywood hasn't done this in years. Even the great George A. Romero can't satire zombies in an intelligent way. Jeez.

Boring Plot-O-Matic

Shock jock Grant Mazzy has, once again, been kicked-off the Big City airwaves and now the only job he can get is the early morning show at CLSY Radio in the small town of Pontypool which broadcasts from the basement of the small town's only church. What begins as another boring day of school bus cancellations, due to yet another massive snow storm, quickly turns deadly.

Bizarre reports start piling in of people developing strange speech patterns and evoking horrendous acts of violence. But there's nothing coming in on the news wires. So... is this really happening? Before long, Grant and the small staff at CLSY find themselves trapped in the radio station as they discover that this insane behavior taking over the town is being caused by a deadly virus being spread through the English language itself.

Do they stay on the air in the hopes of being rescued or, are they in fact providing the virus with its ultimate leap over the airwaves and into the world?

Awesome Review-O-Matic

You would think a movie that takes place in one area (a radio station) and that relies at length on the dialogue would be a dull movie. However, it's the constant setting of a church basement radio station that makes for a good case of clausterphobia run amok. And it's a kudos to the actors whose performances mesmerize you with their voices.

With the recent swine flu outbreak, it's fitting that we'd see a movie that is about how the media would react to a killer virus. Lets see what have we learned? First, panic everybody. Second, panic some more. Third, try to verify the information and gather patients or eyewitnesses to shed some light on the outbreak. Finally, offer advice that leads to more panic.

This is pretty much how Pontypool goes about covering a weird outbreak in the small Canadian town of Pontypool. Grant Mazzy (Stephen McHattie) is a semi Imus clone, outspoken brash and Chomsky-ish. He wants to talk the talk but is forced by his producer Sydney Briar (Lisa Houle) to be the more professional DJ. Mazzy is eager to get his listeners thinking but Sydney scolds him and forces at the scene reports from Ken Loney in the "Sunshine Chopper". Assisting Sydney is war veteran Laurel (Georgina Reilly) who could be a Anna Farris lookalike. She techs up and screens the calls for Mazzy's show.

The set up of another mundane day in the snowstormed town of Pontypool is interrupted by a breaking story of a huge riot at a doctor's clinic (who makes an appearance later on). Mazzy, eager to run with the story before its verified battles his producers before succumbing to having to interview and hear a song from a troupe of actors in Lawrence of Arabia.

Later, Mazzy interviews Ken Loney, the "on the field" reporter as he describes the chaos. It's done "War of the Worlds"-ish. I would have never imagined watching a movie that relies on a radio drama to get the story moving. We are suppose to be watching a MOTION PICTURE, but the 180 we get here on hearing rather than seeing makes it mesmerizing to watch. McHattie's voice and concern seem dirty realistic.

It's the same way you get when you hear NRP's "This American Life" where the sounds and your imagination create much more than any visual could. Some humor is also thrown in when Mazzy is interviewed by a BBC affiliate looking for answers on the chaos.

The virus then hits home, when poor Laurel gets infected causing her to go all mumbly. Locked in the sound booth, we then meet the ever fluent Dr. Mendez. Some light is shed on what may be causing people to go crazy. The doc and a hacked military signal tells our heroes and us that the English language is responsible for the insanity. Yes you read that right. The English language. Soon our heroes are forced to speak Rosetta Stone French to keep sane.

The last half of the movie has Mazzy and Sydney doing the old reliable run and hide amidst the invading now dictionaried and zombified masses pouring into the station. It's tenseful at times, possibly even 3% scary, though nothing a 13 yr old couldn't handle. As we head to the final 15, the thought bubbled lightbulb goes off for Mazzy but not before we get an apocalypse.

So how do you interpret a movie where a virus is spread thru language? Especially the English language.

Bruce McDonald, the director was on hand during the screening I attended and vaguely Area 51d an explanation of the multi-verse theories. It's open to many interpretations he said. I sensed for the most part that Pontypool was a crack at Americanism and how we spread our language, our values and our very annoying pop culture throughout the world.

Does one's culture get lost when they adapt another culture's language and values? Lots of interesting questions are posed. We often joke Canada is the 51st state. Could this actually happen in say 50 years?

Language is power and how we use it is subliminally virus and disease like and perfectly satirized in Pontypool. We can spread ideas through language that affect us all. Even McDonald quipped during the Q&A that Pontypool was picked up to be distributed in South Korea with the tagline "Fear English!".

Pontypool is intelligent, witty and thought provoking and reminds us perfectly how the horror genre can be used to satire the world we live in. It's punched a spot into my list of top 10 horror movies of 2009.

So take off that white mask and head outside. No time to be paranoid about H1N1....your next words could be your last.

WTF moment

Laurel going all word sick and crazy
"Sydney Briar is not dead" chant

The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis

First some fun facts about the movie.

-The movie is adapted from Tony Burgess book "Pontypool Changes Everything"
-It was shot in 15 days and in chronological order
-Stephen McHattie and Lisa Houle are married in real life
-McDonald also directed the Tracy Fragments which starred Canadian hottie Ellen Page

For more information head over to the IFC.

Oddly enough I can actually use the same final description I gave the Signal for Pontypool.

"... [It] is not entirely horror, but is sort of an artsy cinema engulfed in a horror apocalypse."

Now be quiet.

Rating:

Check out the trailer.








Tags:
pontypool, pontypool trailer , canadian horror , pontypool review, indie horror, the signal, zombies, horror movies 2009,

Labels: canada, canadian horror, indepentent horror, indie horror, pontypool, pontypool review, the signal

Posted by the jaded viewer at 12:05 AM | Permalink | Comments | links to this post

Fangoria has listed the upcoming lineup for the Fantasia Film Festival in Montreal, Canada that takes place July 3rd to July 21st.

Below are all the flicks announced that will be screened:

THE MIDNIGHT MEAT TRAIN
REPO! THE GENETIC OPERA
LET THE RIGHT ONE IN (the Swedish vampire-movie sensation)
[REC]
STUCK (Stuart Gorden)
MOTHER OF TEARS (Dario Argento)
RED (the Jack Ketchum adaptation)
BAD BIOLOGY (Frank Henenlotter)
ALL THE BOYS LOVE MANDY LANE
JACK BROOKS: MONSTER SLAYER
TRAILER PARK OF TERROR
FROM WITHIN
DANCE OF THE DEAD (director Gregg Bishop’s riotous zombie flick)
HOME MOVIE (a vérité nightmare)
RULE OF THREE
THE OBJECTIVE (Daniel (BLAIR WITCH PROJECT) Myrick)
THE ECHO (helmed by the original’s Yam Laranas)
PIG HUNT (Jim (JASON X) Isaac’s survival-horror yarn)

Asian flicks

ALONE
4BIA (directors Banjong Pisanthanakun and Parkpoom Wongpoom, creators of the original SHUTTER)
TOKYO GORE POLICE (with star Eihi Shiina of AUDITION)
MAD DETECTIVE
L: CHANGE THE WORLD (Hideo Nakata’s DEATH NOTE spinoff)

European flicks

TIMECRIMES (Spanish time travel flick)
ISLAND OF LOST SOULS
THE SUBSTITUTE
DARK FLOORS
6 FILMS TO KEEP YOU AWAKE: TO LET and THE BABY’S ROOM
TUNNEL RATS (Uwe Boll)

Tags:
fantasia festival 2008, fantasia festival 2008 lineup films , top horror movies of 2008,

Labels: canada, fangoria, fantasia film festival 2008, montreal, twitch, ubisoft

Posted by the jaded viewer at 12:55 AM | Permalink | Comments | links to this post