the jaded viewer

The Broken

The Broken (2008)

Directed by Sean Ellis

I saw the trailer for Sean Ellis Cashback but never saw the movie. It does look really cool.

So instead I saw The Broken. Part of the After Dark Horrorfest flicks.

I can understand After Dark films wanted to have a collection of different horror subgenres to be part of its 8 films to die for.

So what we get here is an anti-gorehound movie for the masses. Very tension filled, suspense driven, M. Knight endingly BORING SNOOZE-A-RAMA.

The movie is filled with moments of nothingness. Absolutely nothing. By nothing of course I mean scene after scene of filler. When a movie starts to flashback to something that happened 15 minutes ago showcasing something dreamlike, you know you're in trouble.

In addition to that ZZZZ-fest on the eyes, all we see is Lena Headey aimlessly walking from one place to another trying to be scared (or Ellis trying to scare us). Which of course isn't scary at all.

All this adds up to a meta-horror universe of Poe and Barker like stories that work out to probably be a good read but makes a horrible movie.

Boring Plot-O-Matic

On a busy street in London, Gina thinks she sees herself drive past in her own car. Stunned by this strange event, Gina follows the mystery woman up to her apartment. From here, events take an eerie turn for the worse until Gina's awareness slides from solid reality into a world that will haunt more than just her nightmares.

Awesome Review-O-Matic

The beginning of a movie has to set up everything so the ending will pay off. But when the set up is long and arduous and ridiculously pointless, you begin to even wonder if the pay off will be worth it.

The Broken's beginning and middle are so broken (pun so fuckin intended) that by the time you get to the "AH HA!" ending, you don't give 2 shits.

Lena Headey (she's actually British you Sarah Connor fans!) plays a radiologist in London. Her family/friends includes:

1.) Her Dad (he's American)
2.) Typical brother dude
3.) Brother's girlfriend
4.) Her boyfriend, some French dude

She sees somebody that resembles herself, we join Gina on figuring out WTF is going on. Soon she starts noticing odd things (aka more nothingness) and a lot of broken mirrors (even more nothingness).

Her family starts to get killed off by their own set of dopplegangers and soon she's next on the hit list.

Suffice it to say, if I kept going I'd probably give away too much.

For a 90 minute movie, it felt like 100 years. Effective movies that build suspense and make the audience hooked to their seats give their audience some idea of what the hell is going on. At no point in the Broken did I get that.

Sure, I was speculating on a wide variety of what was stalking Gina. Was it......

1.) Vampires?
2.) Time traveling assassins?
3.) Evil Dopplegangers?
4.) Ghosts?
5.) Evil Doppleganger, vampire ghost, time traveling assassins?

One of those is true by the way. But by the end, I didn't really care. Usually, I'll IMDB Trivia a movie or Wikipedia or Google to get more info.

There was no way I was gonna give this movie too much of my brain power.

Here are a few fun facts from The Broken:

1.) Times somebody takes a shower: 3
2.) Times we see Lena Headey nude: 1 (boobies!)
3.) Times we see a fake looking crash test dummy in a dreamlike car accident: 4
4.) Times we see the London Underground: 2
5.) Times we see a broken mirror: too many to count

Gore-ipedia (if you want to be shocked don't read)

Suffocationand blunt trauma
Mouth trauma
Vehicular crash test dummy trauma

Nude-ipedia (because you like boobies)

Lena Headey gets nude!!! (only boobies and walking around nakedness)
British girl gets naked

WTF moment

The ending that I saw coming a billion light years away

The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis

I don't discriminate in my horror movies. I am a big gorehound but I also dig the psychological horror, the Mist-like horror films that are all about suspense.

But this really was a big snoozefest and if it wasn't seeing Lena Headey nude, this would have been totally pointless.

Be sure to check out the used DVD bin at your Walmart. This is where you will find the Broken.


Rating:
The Trailer






Tags:
after dark horrorfest, after dark horrorfest 2009 , lena headey nude , 8 films to die for, horrorfest, after dark horrorfest 2009 trailers, gratuitous nudity, horror movies of 2009, the broken,the broken review

Labels: after dark horrorfest 2009, after dark horrorfest 2009 reviews, after dark horrorfest 3, british horror, doppleganger, lena headey, lena headey naked, lena headey nude, the broken, the broken review

Posted by the jaded viewer at 12:05 AM | Permalink | Comments | links to this post

Today all the After Dark Horrorfest movies come out on DVD. It's a wide variety of horror subgenres ranging from cannibals, dopplegangers, witchcraft and time travel.

Honestly, most of these movies kinda suck.

So to spare you the "should I Netlfix or *gasp* even purchase" some of these movies, I will put all my reviews right in this post.

So this week is After Dark Horrorfest review week at the jaded viewer.

So far I've reviewed 3 of the 8 films to die for. I'll have the rest of them coming up this week as well.

Sometimes I question the After Dark's committee selection. Did they even watch these films? They are more like 8 films to stay away from.

Check out the reviews

Labels: 8 films to die for, after dark, after dark horrorfest 2009, after dark horrorfest 2009 reviews, after dark horrorfest 3, dying breed, from within, perkins 14, slaughter, the broken

Posted by the jaded viewer at 12:05 AM | Permalink | Comments | links to this post

Perkins 14 is an example of fan created horror. Not really a first, but a rare occurence in this day and age.

The film was developed by Massify.com. Writers submitted story ideas, audition tapes were uploaded and the cast and winning story were chosen.

So their tagline that a film invented, written, cast, voted for, chosen and created by YOU, isn't that farfetched.

Now part of the After Dark Horrorfest 2009 lineup we'll see if something created by US is actually fuckin good.

Here be the plot chosen by YOU.

Plot o rama

Robert Perkins builds an army of 14 people brainwashed through cult-like methods to protect him from his parents' killers. When Perkins is imprisoned, the police unwittingly unleash his followers on a small town and they've only got one thing on their mind: "Kill for Mr. Perkins."

Now watch the trailer created by YOU.

**UPDATE**

I've watched Perkins 14. CHECK OUT MY REVIEW!!!

**END UPDATE**




Tags:
after dark horrorfest, after dark horrorfest 2009 , perkins 14 , 8 films to die for, horrorfest, after dark horrorfest 2009 trailers, horror, gratuitous nudity, top horror movies of 2009, twitch, horror blog, the jaded viewer

Labels: 8 films to die for, after dark horrorfest 2009, after dark horrorfest 3, autopsy, butterfly effect revelation, dying breed, faithless, from within, perkins 14, someone behind you, the broken, voices

Posted by the jaded viewer at 12:05 AM | Permalink | Comments | links to this post

After Dark Horrorfest 2009 finally has a full lineup for the 8 movies to die for. I've seen a few of the past horrofest flicks in the theatre in 07 and 08. Some were damn good, some were fuckin horrible.

It's scheduled from January 9th to January 15th, 2009.

I've watched some of the trailers (when available and read the vague plot summaries) and below is my list of what I'm fuckin excited to see.

1.) Perkins 14

(JUST REVIEWED!!! CLICK HERE FOR THE FULL REVIEW!!)

Plot: Robert Perkins builds an army of 14 people brainwashed through cult-like methods to protect him from his parents' killers. When Perkins is imprisoned, the police unwittingly unleash his followers on a small town and they've only got one thing on their mind: "Kill for Mr. Perkins."

The Jaded Viewer says: Internet hype here has been fuckin relentless. But Manson like shit hitting the fan could possibly turn this into something fun.

Trailer: None

2.) Dying Breed

(JUST REVIEWED!!! CLICK HERE FOR THE FULL REVIEW!!)

Plot: Inspired by the legends of a 19th-century cannibal and an extinct tiger, this brutal horror-thriller centers on four friends who find out that something—or someone—murderous lurks in the rain-slogged Australian bush.

The Jaded Viewer says: Australia has been churning some bloody decent horror of late. Kills a plenty from the trailer. Could it be rednecks? Ancient spirits of evil? Killer koalas?

Trailer:





3.) From Within

(JUST REVIEWED!!! CLICK HERE FOR THE FULL REVIEW!!)

Plot: The residents of a small American town begin to die one-by-one apparently by suicide...

The Jaded Viewer says: The Sarah Connor Chronicles cast sure makes a lot of horror movies. Looks like the Happening, but will it be without the lame ending? Because suicides are fuckin funny...err....I mean sad. My guess, the suicides are caused by killer koalas.

Trailer:





4.) Autopsy

(JUST REVIEWED!!! CLICK HERE FOR THE FULL REVIEW!!)

Plot: A young woman tries to find her injured boyfriend in a bizzare and dangerous hospital

The Jaded Viewer says: I'm a big fan of Dr. Giggles. So if some doctors perform some unauthorized surgeries on some hipsters, who am I to argue? I also am a big fan of bonesaws.

Trailer:





5.) The Broken


(JUST REVIEWED!!! CLICK HERE FOR THE FULL REVIEW!!)

Plot: On a busy street in London, Gina thinks she sees herself drive past in her own car. Stunned by this strange event, Gina follows the mystery woman up to her apartment. From here, events take an eerie turn for the worse until Gina's awareness slides from solid reality into a world that will haunt more than just her nightmares.

The Jaded Viewer says: It's probably all the episodes of Sarah Connor Chronicles I;ve watcged but Lena Headey is fuckin hot. And the trailer shows her in a bathtub naked. Umm, I have no idea what this movie is about but the potential of gratuitous nudity from Sarah Connor. Score!

Trailer:





6.) Slaughter aka Faithless

(JUST REVIEWED!!! CLICK HERE FOR THE FULL REVIEW!!)

Plot: A young woman thinks she is leaving her abusive life behind when she moves to Atlanta and ends up living at her family farm. She quickly learns that abuse comes in even crueler forms.

The Jaded Viewer says: Please let it be Luther the Geek who abuses her at the farm.

Trailer: None

7.) Voices aka Du saram-yida aka Someone Behind You

Plot: Ga-in, a smart, pretty girl who is loved by everyone, witnesses the deaths of people around her. She is then singled out as the next in line to die from the curse that has one person in each generation die at the hands of two people close to them. Ga-in searched for the truth about the curse with Suk-min, a boy who always lingers around her, and her boyfriend Heon-joong, but attacks on her life by those dearest to her, like her best friend and her mother, never cease...

The Jaded Viewer says: Thats a fucked up curse. How about if she watches the cursed videotape from the Ring? Or gets a missed call? Which curse would kill her first? Is their a curse hierarchy?

Trailer:





8.) Butterfly Effect: Revelation

(JUST REVIEWED!!! CLICK HERE FOR THE FULL REVIEW!!)

Plot: Sequel to the 2003 cult movie in which a person can change the past via remembering their forgotten memories due to blackouts.

The Jaded Viewer says: I never saw the first one, so I am hell not gonna see this one.

Trailer:






Tags:
after dark horrorfest, after dark horrorfest 2009 , perkins 14 , 8 films to die for, horrorfest, after dark horrorfest 2009 trailers, horror, gratuitous nudity, top horror movies of 2009, twitch, horror blog, the jaded viewer

Labels: 8 films to die for, after dark horrorfest 2009, after dark horrorfest 3, autopsy, butterfly effect revelation, dying breed, faithless, from within, perkins 14, someone behind you, the broken, voices

Posted by the jaded viewer at 12:05 AM | Permalink | Comments | links to this post

After Dark Horrorfest 2009 is shaping up to be very interesting.

It's scheduled from January 9th to January 15th, 2009.

The confirmed list of movies are below.

1.) The Broken
2.) Slaughter aka Faithless
3.) Perkins 14
4.) Butterfly Effect: Revelation
5.) From Within
6.) Dying Breed
7.) Autopsy
8.) TBD

I'm kinda psyched up Perkins 14.

For all plot summaries check out Bloody Disgusting's summary page.

Labels: 8 films to die for, after dark horrorfest 2009, autopsy, butterfly effect revelation, dying breed, faithless, from within, perkins 14, the broken

Posted by the jaded viewer at 12:05 AM | Permalink | Comments | links to this post